TIGER SKIN?

      Is the public ready to see Tiger’s woody?  It’s hard to believe that it’s been less than a month since the juggernaut of the Tiger Woods scandal has taken over the news, eclipsing everything from national health care to the Copenhagen climate conference.  Starting with the car crash heard all around the media on Nov. 27th, the disgraced all-American role model has allegedly been romantically linked to about a dozen women (But no men… yet!).  These include NYC full-time socialite Rachel Uchitel, San Diego cocktail waitress Jaimee Grubbs, and two XXX film stars– Joslyn James (“Porn Star Brides”) and Holly Sampson (“Romantic Routine”, “Sexual Cleansing”).  Most recently, lovers of male celebrity skin have been waiting to see reported nude photos of the 33-year old: some taken by the golfer himself (Love those I Phones!) and some taken by an alleged mistress or two.  Model Jamie Jungers has claimed to have photos of Woods naked and passed out in a hotel room.  The busiest man in sports has apologized for his “transgressions” and has admitted to marital infidelity.  On December 9, “Playgirl” Magazine stated that they were interested in publishing photos presumed to be Woods.  A spokesman for “Playgirl” stated that the magazine for gay men– uh, I mean women– was approached by a “third party” with pics that appeared to be the real deal.   At this point, Tiger’s people have neither confirmed or denied the presence of naked photos.  However, on December 11, his lawyers obtained an injunction in the High Court of Justice of England and Wales to prevent “unspecified claims about his private life from being published in the UK press“; specifically, prohibiting the publication of any images of Woods naked or in the throws of sexual ecstasy.  Hmmm… On December 14, “Playgirl” nixed the idea of publishing the photos, partially because they were not able to be 100% verified, and partially because the magazine prefers to have the consent of the men who appear in their mag au naturel.  Perhaps the skin mag was worried about a repeat of August 1997, when Brad Pitt sued “Playgirl” for publishing nude photos of him, apparently snapped and published without his permission.  Or maybe the alleged photos were not of Tiger, but of another 6’1″, 185 lb golfer of Asian/Native American/Caucasian/African-American descent…  So, my fellow voyeurs, it may be a while before we see Tiger’s golf balls.  Things may not look good right now for the star who was born Eldrich Woods— but then again, notoriety is not always a bad thing.  Nekked pics of Mr. Woods  would definitely get the star some new fans who, I’ll betcha, have NEVER seen a golf game.  And, a porn film parody called “Tiger’s Wood” is already in the works.  The XXX film company Vivid (which is not producing “Tiger’s Wood”, BTW…) is offering up to $1 million to any former Woods mistress who will star in an upcoming Vivid porn film.  America, the land of opportunity!